A look back 9/12/10

I look back at all that happened during my time on the streets and I am so blessed that God would have put me in such a place. It was worth every bit of worry, suffering and scorn I went through.

It brought me to a whole new level of trust in God. When you are fully dependent on God for food, safety, shelter, divine appointments and situation; he is able to use it better than you thought he could. I am currently a college student, so a similar struggle is something that I have dealt with for the last year and nine months, so this brought me to a nice deeper level of that trust. Even with what little I do have I feel way more blessed after not having the comforts that I once took for granted.

I traveled with YWAM to Raynosa, Mexico in my sophomore year of high school. I got to do ministry in the trash dumps where people had formed communities there. To see people living in that kind of situation had an impact on you, and gives you a real appreciation for what you do have. Now, getting to experience first hand living in that kind of situation, gave me a deeper appreciation for what I do have and what God has done.

The group I went with to Mexico

One of the areas we went to in Mexico


I was able to get talk to people on a level that I might not have otherwise. Would people have opened up if they knew my real situation, or can we relate better this way?

I gained a real understanding of what we need to be in people lives. We pass by too often only seeing the persons problems and not seeing them for who and what they are.

Who should you help? Who shouldn't you? Just because they might have a problem with addiction doesn't mean that I can't speak life to them and try to help influence their lives for the better, and you never know, somebody who is asking for help might really need it.

I will write up more about this as it comes to mind.

I'm sorry that I have not finished up sooner. Thank you for your interest and I would love to hear more from you all.
Thank you, God Bless
-Ben

Saturday 8/14/10

Final Day.

Woke up about 7:15. Went pee in the alley and quickly took off. I have never done that before and never will again. I was so worried about somebody seeing me. Walked a few blocks up to Intelligentsia for a cup of coffee. Jumped on a train heading south for the library.

Sat at the library on the computer for a bit. Tried to catch up on emails and messages.

Went up to Seattles Best and got a very large cup of coffee. I had a large headache and wanted the caffeine.

Jumped on a train up to Uptown to meet up with Molly. Found a spot near where we were supposed to meet and sat down. Fell asleep with a sign next to me.

Molly showed up about an hour after I sat down. I was very glad to finally see her again.

We went to Josh's place and I was finally able to clean up. After taking a shower I put on my first pair of clean underwear. I screamed "Thank you God for clean underwear!", it was amazing to have again.

I got to talk with Josh about his experience and exchange stories for a while with him.

A picture from when Molly picked me up.

People watching 9/13/10

Its funny sitting on the sidewalk and watching people. Interactions like this can't be found anywhere else.

One guys is trying to tell people about his cause (I'm not sure what). Everyone he tries to talk to brushes him off and keeps walking. He is very friendly and courteous to people, but they wont respond the same to him. People don't want to use their time or money for another person asking for it.

People know when they are being used. People love honesty and usually know when somebody is talking to them just for money.

I stopped him and asked what he was trying to do. he was with an organization that helped children in impoverished countries.

He worked for:

children.org
a child sponsorship program

People seem to be lost in their own little world. Ipods, Cell phones, and computers have them walking down the street as it they were the only ones there. They ignore others around them and rush on with their busy lives.

It's annoying to see soo many skimpy clothed girls with bag after bag of clothing and expensive accessories walking down the street. What is your life worth? Isn't there more to life?

Business people are the worst. There is nothing in the world other than them. The women are the hardest, they have a hard time getting anywhere at work and become hardened to everything else.

Social Experiment round 2

Tried the signs again and got a bit reactions while sitting by the Old Navy on State St. My time holding the sign only lasted about ten minutes before interruption came around.

A middle aged guy decided to set up his microphone and speaker near where I was sitting. He started by yelling things at people like: "read your bible!", "There are no homosexuals in heaven, your gonna burn!", "You smokers can't get to heaven" and many more things that were condemning and not reflecting of the love of Christ.

I find that more I see thing like this the more it hurts my heart and annoys me. For the first time I decided to be confrontational with another believed.

Started to ask him what Christ would be saying to these people. The more he yelled, the more they ignored him.

Told him that this was not a very loving way to reach people. When he kept ignoring me and telling me off, I started to get annoyed.

I Started reading 1 Cor. 13 and spoke it loudly, loud enough to drown out the sound of his hatefulness with a mic.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but have not love, i am only a resounding gong of a clanging cymbal"
-1 Cor. 13:1

I continued on through 1 Cor. 13 about what love is.

I had a few people come up to me and thank me for what I was doing. This was not the reaction I wanted, but people were glad to have somebody trying to give a good reflection of Christ. From what they said, he was there all the time and usually very hateful.

I finished with Cor 13 and decided to try out some signs.

First sign was
-"Who are you to judge?"
Second
-"Is this what Christ would do?"

I held the signs silently across the sidewalk from him. I held the first one for 5 minutes and the second for 10. I stood and stared at him the whole time.

He finally after the 15 minutes I held the sign, packed up and left the streets.

How I Feel 8/13/10

I think that today I will spend my time praying over the city. Prayers of blessing, security and Godly prosperity.

I am ready to go home, and even more ready to hold Molly again. Its amazing how relationship is so necessary to a person. I have felt very alone most of the week and I hate it. I love how into the wild ends with him talking about how "life is better when shared"

Friday 8/13/10

Last Full Day!

Another PGM wake up......5 a.m. Get up and put on the same nasty clothes. Sitting for 45 minutes and waiting on another crappy service to begin. Got through it. Breakfast was once again, oatmeal......I hate oatmeal! I was not in a very good mood that morning.

Left right after breakfast. Walked all the way up to the park by the library. Rested there until 9:50ish. One of the alcoholic black guys yelled at me to leave. "Wake up white boy and move out!". I didn't want to start anything with him so I moved up to borders.

Stopped at McDonalds and bought a few mcdoubles for the homeless around the area. Tried to strike up conversations but didn't get very far. One was very impressed that I would do such a thing for him, but i'm guessing that I am not the first person.

Decided to walk around and pray over the city. I wished there were more people to do it with me, but thought it would be a good idea anyway. Prayed over parts of downtown, Grant park, Lincoln park and Millenium park. Prayed for ministry to be done there, Gods work in people hearts there, and more.

After my walk around I decided to hit the library for a bible study. Got in a small study of John 17 and a daily Proverb. Went upstairs to the religion reference section and browsed. I could not find anything good about Branhamism, only two books in the library mentioned anything about it. It has been a point of study lately that I was hoping to learn more about it.

Got tired of searching through books and decided to sit along State street and people watch.

Saw a homeless person about my age sitting across the street. I decided to put up sign #5 again hoping that I could gather some money to buy her food. Sat for about 20 minutes and finally Paul came along.

Paul invited me to join him for dinner. He was on his way to Billy Elliot (a broadway production). He bought me a sandwich and bottle of water at Potbellys. We sat and talked about life and where we came from. Told him that even through these tough times God has still been good to me. He gave me $7 and some change and we parted ways. I won't forget how kind he was and realistic, he just wanted to help another person in need.

I took the water and went over to the girl I was trying to get money for. I asked her if she had dinner yet. She hadn't so I went back to Potbellys and bought her a sandwich. Got back and tried talking to her, she was very quiet and didn't want to respond. her name was Dee and she was also living on the street. We dissed on PGM for a bit, she had stayed there once and hated it. When I couldn't keep the conversation going I left. Told her that God loved her and to take care. Gave her the $3 and change from my pocket and told her to get breakfast in the morning.

I walked two blocks south and tried my second Social experiment (Will post write up soon)

It started to rain, so I sat at the cultural center for a bit. I ran up to a McDonalds to use the bathroom and almost got lost along the way. When the rain let up I found a dry spot along the side of a buildings to sleep.

(On the way to McDonalds I got lost. I asked a guy for directions and he was very helpful, but quite a strange fellow. He asked me to repeat after him " The grass was green, in the valley, where my foot get cut off and there were two coneheads, in the vision I had from Jesus" Weird!)

Posts

I have 2 more days worth of blogs for you guys.

Thank you for your interest. I will try to have the rest of my journals up soon.

I would love for any questions. you can send them to me at: blackb3n@gmail.com

Thank you
-Ben